Try this fun experiment:

Hold your hands opposite each other, fingers open. Bend your middle fingers and hold them together back to back, then join the remaining three fingers and your thumb of both hands, tip to tip.

Try to separate only your thumbs in this position. Your thumbs (your parents) will open, because you are not destined to live with them all your life and usually you will outlive them anyway.

Join your thumbs as before and separate your index fingers (siblings). They will also open, because your brothers and sisters have to live their own separate lives.

Put your index fingers back together again and separate your little fingers (your children). They too will open, because when your children are grown they are meant to move out and find their own way separate from you.

Lastly, join your little fingers again and try to separate your ring fingers, representing your spouse.
You will find that you simply cannot to this – because Husband & Wife are meant to remain together all their lives!

The post Why do we wear our wedding rings on the fourth finger? appeared first on Life Celebrations.

“I promise if there’s only one TimTam left, I’ll let you have it.”

“I promise to love you even when you make me so mad, I hate you.”

I always encourage my couples to include personal vows in their ceremony. If you would like to compose your own but don’t know where to start, I suggest writing a letter to your beloved saying everything that you love about them, then pick a few sentences out of that letter and play with the words until you feel that they say just want you want when exchanging personal vows.

You can include personal vows either before or after the legal vows and these can be separate from or part of the ring ceremony – if you are going to have rings (this is completely optional). However you want to do it, it’s your choice but your celebrant will guide you so that the ceremony flows well.

Just remember that this is your day, your wedding, and your declaration to your love. So why not include personal vows?

https://www.sydneycelebrantjanegillespie.com.au/

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But – unless Dan and Cora had lodged a Notice of Intended Marriage (NOIM) at least a month beforehand, this would not have been a legal marriage.

For all those people who think it would be a lovely idea to spring a surprise wedding on their beloved, I’m afraid the bad news is that it simply isn’t possible in our country.

In Australia the law is quite clear. No one must feel as though they are being pressured into agreeing to a marriage. Even if you’re madly in love and are planning to marry and have already lodged your NOIM within the prescribed time frame, you can’t spring a surprise wedding on your beloved. If you suddenly decide that it would be a fabulous idea to surprise him or her at what they thought was going to be a birthday party or family picnic or any other occasion, by producing a marriage celebrant and telling them that you’re getting married here and now, please think again! The ‘surprisee’ may genuinely not want to get married at that precise moment for any number of reasons but might feel too embarrassed to say no.

However, if you are planning on surprising your guests by announcing that the engagement party/baby naming/birthday celebration they are attending is actually your wedding then that’s fine because it will be a decision you have made together. But use caution if family members aren’t present because they may very well be hurt and disappointed to have not been part of such a momentous occasion in your lives.

It’s great to be spontaneous, but if you’re thinking about having a surprise wedding, please discuss the ramifications with your celebrant first.

© Jane Gillespie

https://www.sydneycelebrantjanegillespie.com.au

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As your wedding day approaches you may be bouncing around a new name in your head. Changing names can often make a bride a little sad at the loss of her former name, so it’s perfectly natural to want to hold onto your old name, or even ask your husband if he wants to change names! Over 80% of Australian brides go onto change names, with the vast majority taking their husband’s name and dropping their own surname.

The name change process is simple and straightforward. After the wedding Jane, your celebrant, registers the marriage online with NSW Births, Deaths and Marriages (BDM). At the same time she will order your marriage certificate, if requested. Your certificate is typically delivered by registered mail within 3-5 business days.

On your wedding day you receive a presentation marriage certificate. While some companies will accept this as proof of your marriage name change, most government departments and banks insist on seeing your original BDM certificate or a certified copy. Your BDM certificate has additional security features that helps safeguard your identity.

Once you have your BDM marriage certificate it’s recommended you update government issued photo ID first, such as your driver’s license. This needs to be done in person at any NSW Service Centre. You can then show your updated driver’s license at many places as proof of your new name.

You can update your passport at this stage if you don’t have any pending international travel. If you have flights booked under your maiden name you should not change the name on your passport until your return.

You may be eligible for a free replacement passport in your new name, provided your current passport has at least two years validity remaining.

Next, get your financial records updated. Banks with large branch networks always require you to visit in person. Be sure to take your original BDM marriage certificate, bank ATM or credit cards and photo ID. An appointment is usually not necessary.  ING have a name change form for you to complete and be certified by one of the listed professionals. For all other banks contact them directly to learn the process.

Medicare cards must be updated in person. Take your original marriage certificate and photo ID. You can also have your name appear on the same card as your spouse by completing the Medicare Transfer form. Both husband and wife should sign the form. While the form can be returned by mail, name changes must be done in person, so it’s best to take the form in with you when changing names.

From this point you may have around 10 to 15 additional companies to notify. Most of these changes can be done in writing and brides will all have differing companies to update. Your list should include phone and Internet; pay TV, utilities, insurance, super, loyalty and frequent flyer clubs. Download a comprehensive checklist here.

Contact each company directly to ask their name change procedure, what proof is required (some companies may accept a photocopy of your driver’s license instead of your marriage certificate, or not require any proof). Some companies may need you to send a letter or a fax, so make sure you get the address. You may also be required to return a form.

Name change kits, like the one from www.easynamechange.com/au, provide all the necessary forms and paperwork and give you the name change procedures for over 400 Australian companies.

Customers can save $7 off any kit by entering code JANEGILLESPIE at checkout.

However you decide to change names, aim to get all your records updated within 2 months of starting as it can become difficult when proving your identity. It’s also worthwhile hanging onto some back records and expired photo ID under your old name should you ever need to prove your old name.

If you have any questions about changing names, speak to the professionals at www.easynamechange.com/au for obligation free name change advice.

The post Changing your name after marriage appeared first on Life Celebrations.

However, it won’t be time for a full celebration until the Marriage Act is changed to allow marriage between same sex couples. Even if this is passed by Parliament next month, there will still be certain procedures that must be followed before celebrants can officiate marriage for gay couples.

Don’t open yourselves up to disappointment by thinking you can lodge a Notice of Intended Marriage in the hope that you can be legally married to your same sex partner this year. We have to wait until new documentation has been approved for our use. By all means register your interest with your preferred celebrant, but you cannot start the legal process until we are given the go ahead by the Federal Attorney-General.

Sydney Marriage Celebrant

The post MARRIAGE EQUALITY appeared first on Life Celebrations.

Celebrants must also give their couples information about a variety of organisations that provide educational courses to help strengthen relationships.

I believe that this is an excellent suggestion because it gives couples the opportunity to learn early on if there are likely to be any issues of conflict in their marriage and teach them how to negotiate and compromise before serious problems arise.

Some couples may think that their celebrant is recommending counselling for them but this isn’t the case, because that could imply that there is something missing from or wrong with their relationship.  Pre-marriage courses are a useful way to deepen a connection that is already strong – why else would they want to marry each other? While everything is rosy right now, attending a course gives them tools to help negotiate their way through difficulties that might occur in their relationship when life throws up unexpected challenges.

Make no mistake, ‘life’ happens to everyone so it can only be helpful to learn as much as you can about how to cope, survive and thrive together.

For couples who don’t want to enrol in a formal course or don’t have time to do so before their wedding I have a series of questions that I recommend they discuss together to see if they are on the same page as each other and if not, to discuss together and find compromises that work for both of them.

www.sydneycelebrantjanegillespie.com.au

The post Relationship Education for Couples – Highly Recommended! appeared first on Life Celebrations.

Would you like to get married in Australia even if you don’t live here?  Anyone from anywhere can get married here provided they are ‘eligible’.  To be eligible you must be over the age of 18, not closely related to each other and not already married. There are no residency requirements and you could in fact get married on the same day that you arrive here, though most people wouldn’t want to do that – imagine suffering jet-lag while trying to focus on your wedding vows! However, there are other requirements that must be me

The most important requirement is the necessity to lodge a Notice of Intended Marriage with your officiant a minimum of one month before the date of your ceremony. 

Your celebrant keeps the Notice until after he or she has officiated at your marriage, when it is sent to the Registry of Births Deaths & Marriages (BDM), together with Declarations of No Legal Impediment to Marriage that you both must sign before the ceremony takes place, and your Official Marriage Certificate.

Your celebrant can register your marriage with BDM online and you are able to collect this from the Registry Office the next business day. Depending on your own country’s laws you may need to have the certificate authenticated or apostilled to have your marriage recognised there.

Information about this service can be found here: http://smartraveller.gov.au/services/legalising-documents/Pages/australia.aspx.

When you marry in Australia you can choose any day of the year, any time of the day and any location, that a celebrant is willing to perform the ceremony for you. Sydney is one of the most spectacular cities in the world, so you can choose a magnificent backdrop for your photos, ranging from a cliff top above the ocean, anywhere beside our magnificent Harbour, on the steps of the Opera House, on a stunning beach or in the Royal Botanic Gardens. 

So if you think you would like to marry here, the first thing to do is research celebrants then contact the one you think you would like to perform this service for you and start the legal process – lodging your Notice of Intended Marriage.  I would love to help you fulfil your dream of marrying in Sydney. Email me at jane@life-celebrations.com.au or call +61 412 643 751   

www.sydneycelebrantjanegillespie.com.au

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So you’re planning your wedding – congratulations!  There are many websites that offer good planning tools for your wedding and these can help you decide what you need to do for your special day, depending on how simple or extravagant you want it to be.

However I’ve noticed that very few of these tools place any real importance on choosing your celebrant and I find this really puzzling. Although your wedding day should be a wonderful party, it is just one day. But it is also the day when you will make a life-long commitment to the love of your life.

So although it’s important to decide on and book your reception venue, as soon as that date is locked in it’s wise to start looking for a celebrant.

It is really important to find the right person; someone that you have a rapport with, someone you feels ‘gets’ you and your fiancé and who will present you with a ceremony that reflects who you both are, as well as your hopes and dreams for the future.

Experienced celebrants are often booked a year or more in advance, so locking in your preferred person should be a priority.

While organising the reception, your wedding gown, the cake, flowers, cars, rings, choosing your hairstyle, make-up artist, photographer/videographer, etc. are all important, if you don’t end up with a ceremony that you will remember fondly forever as a true representation of you and your future husband, you will have just had a party.

Remember: without your celebrant, you won’t actually be a married.

So ask around among your friends, relatives and work colleagues if they can recommend someone. Do your own research, look for reviews on celebrants’ own websites and on social media and meet a few to make sure you find the right person for you; someone who will help you create a ceremony that will be the foundation on which you will build your marriage.

Don’t base your decision simply on price. Overall, your celebrant will probably cost less than most other items on your list and most of us will spend many hours making sure that you have the ceremony of your dreams.

One last thing: if you’ve contacted several celebrants by email, text or phone and even met a one or two, please let them know whether you want to go ahead with them or not. We know we won’t win every booking, but it is very frustrating to have had conversations with couples, either electronically or in person, and then have them simply disappear without any explanation.

It only takes a few minutes to send a quick text or email to say, ‘thank you for your response/meeting us, but we have chosen another celebrant’. You don’t have to say why, but a simple thanks for our time is most appreciated!

And I thank you for reading this post!

https://www.sydneycelebrantjanegillespie.com.au

The post WHERE DOES YOUR CELEBRANT COME ON YOUR WEDDING PLANNING LIST? appeared first on Life Celebrations.

“Civil marriage celebrants have overseen the majority of marriages since 1999 and the proportion of marriage ceremonies overseen by a civil celebrant increased again to 74.1 per cent of all marriages in 2014.” (Most recent statistics from the Australian Bureau of Statistics).

A civil marriage ceremony is far more than exchanging vows and rings and being declared husband and wife.  There are some words that must be used to fulfil legal requirements but it is the extras that a dedicated marriage celebrant will help you with that will make your ceremony uniquely yours.

As well as working with couples to help them create their perfect ceremony, an Australian marriage celebrant must accept a Notice of Intended Marriage from them at least one calendar month before the date of the wedding, sight their original birth certificates or passports and, if either has been married before, divorce or death certificates of a previous spouse.     

Every couple that comes to meet me is given a comprehensive information kit to keep. If you decide you want me to marry you I then get to know something about you and your relationship so I can start work on your ceremony.

Depending on which of my packages you choose I consult with you on the content, then offer you an onsite rehearsal, officiate at the marriage, register your marriage online when I get home and send all relevant paperwork to the Registry of Births Death & Marriage (BDM) so that you can apply for your official marriage certificate.  Although you are given a presentation certificate to take with you after the ceremony, if the bride wants to change her name the certificate from BDM is the only document that is accepted by the Passports Office, the Roads and Traffic authority in your State, and at banks, etc.

Sometimes people genuinely think that a celebrant just turns up for 30 minutes on their wedding day, whereas the truth is that most of us will spend anything from six to 30 hours on every ceremony that we help to create. Of course couples need to be able to factor everything into the total they’re prepared to spend on their wedding, however I find it surprising that quite a few people don’t realise that an experienced civil marriage celebrant will spend as many hours as it takes to present them with the ceremony of their dreams. It’s important to realise that your wedding is a wonderful party, but without a celebrant there is no marriage.  

CALL ME NOW FOR YOUR OBLIGATION-FREE FIRST CONSULTATION

www.sydneycelebrantjanegillespie.com.au

The post Do you know what a civil marriage celebrant does? appeared first on Life Celebrations.

Sunshine
Brides and grooms normally imagine their wedding day as filled with sunshine, with amazing pictures because of this. While plenty of sun is often the perfect backdrop to this special day, not all of your guests will want to be in full sun for hours on end. It’s fine if your ceremony is fairly short but asking guests to sit or stand in full sun for long periods of time can be extremely uncomfortable for them. If your reception is going to be outdoors as well, renting a marquee is a smart idea so that people can seek relief in the shade this will provide. A basket filled with sunscreen, cheap sunglasses and even paper hats is another way to show guests that you care about their wellbeing and comfort. Don’t forget that it’s not only the guests who are exposed to the sun. When the ceremony is in the open the bride and groom, bridesmaids and celebrant are likely to feel uncomfortable as well, so have some parasols handy to provide a bit of protection for them.

Here are some businesses in my local area (Sydney’s Lower North Shore) that hire marquees:

• http://www.walkershire.com.au/marquees/cat_29.html
• https://www.hiresquare.com.au/cat/event-tents/
• https://www.extreme-marquees.com.au/

Rain
While splashing in the rain can be fun, that’s usually not the case for people dressed in formal wear. Even if it is normally nice during the month of your wedding, it’s important to remember that the only thing that’s predictable about the weather is its un-predictability.

Having a back-up plan for outdoor ceremonies (and receptions) is essential. Talk to a rental company to find out if it’s possible to have a request for a marquee the week of the wedding without paying upfront. Then you can watch the weather and spend the money only if it’s necessary. It’s best to hire a marquee that has sides to it because rain can blow in when there are open sides. Rental companies can give you all the details and limitations of the marquees they hire out.

Don’t forget that rain can have a big impact on your wedding photo shoot. Always have an indoor option as a Plan B. You don’t want your wedding dress to be stained by rain because that will show in your wedding photos. There are quite a few indoor facilities where you can take beautiful photos for a small fee, e.g. one might be Sydney University. Make sure you speak to the personnel at the venue in time to make sure someone else hasn’t booked it.

So if you’re afraid that there could be torrential rain on your special day, it’s worth considering booking an indoor location for your photos. Almost anywhere can be booked if you arrange it well in advance. Think modern or historic buildings, five-star hotel foyers, sporting venues, theatres, museums, libraries, universities and so on. The best option of all is a location that has some meaning to you both.

Wind
When rain and wind join forces, really unfavourable conditions are possible. Wind by itself can be less of a problem, but you still need to take precautions. Wind can have an impact on the audibility of the ceremony and strong gusts can prevent your guests from hearing the two of you as you exchange your vows during an outdoor ceremony. So you need to make sure you have high quality microphones and speakers. Also, even if the weather is sunny and warm, the wind can whisk away plates, napkins, and cups at an outdoor ceremony if you are having your reception in the same location. If the wind is powerful enough, it might even blow food and drinks to the ground. Making sure that all items are weighted or kept in an indoor area is the best idea.

Extreme Weather Conditions
A little bit of rain and a breeze that cools down a hot day won’t usually be much of a problem on your wedding day. However, extreme weather conditions such as thunder and lightning, hurricanes or flooding, can create genuine difficulties. Making provisions for such happenings is smart, especially if you’re getting married at a time of year when these things might occur. Also, understand that in severe weather conditions, some of your guests may need to cancel because it might be unsafe for them to travel in really bad weather conditions. If your guest list is dramatically reduced because of the weather, find out if your reception venue will offer you anything because you will most likely still be charged for the number of people you asked them to cater for. They might add in some extra starters or desserts for the people who can be there.

Cold
Even if the mercury isn’t near freezing point, low temperatures may still discourage people from spending much time outside. If you have your heart set on holding the ceremony outdoors and the reception area is partially open, think about having outdoor heaters. These are unlikely to draw crowds outside on the coldest of days, but they can help to heat up the perimeter when the weather is mildly chilly. Heaters can be rented from various places, such as:

• https://www.hiresquare.com.au/cat/heater/
• http://www.toastyheaterhire.com.au/
• http://www.partytime.com.au/-product_hire/heating/

Also, understand that your bridal party (and you!) may want to bundle up if your ceremony will be held in frigid air. Don’t forget to bring a jacket for your photoshoot. Before, after and when walking from one location to the other, you’ll be glad you brought something warm – possibly even wearing a beautiful pashmina or furry shrug while having your photos done. Just remember that if it is truly freezing you’re better off going with your Plan B, i.e. somewhere indoors!

Heat
Heat can be extremely dangerous, especially for people who are not very well. When your wedding ceremony and/or reception are held outdoors in the heat, make sure that plenty of water is available for people to have ready access to. Have strategically placed cooler bins filled with ice and bottles of water. Providing a shady spot as discussed in the sunshine section, and inexpensive folding paper fans can help people keep cool as well. If the weather is extremely hot, you may also wish to hire emergency personnel to have on hand in the event that someone does begin to suffer from the heat. At the least, keep a list of emergency numbers and reminders about the importance of staying cool handy.

Vulnerable people
Pay special attention to people who are more vulnerable to various outdoor conditions such as the elderly, babies, children and people who already experience physical challenges. You can ask someone you trust or your wedding planner to pay special attention to these groups of people.

The weather doesn’t have to ruin your wedding day, but you must prepare and plan for different types of adverse conditions in order to stay ahead of the weather and to make it work for you. Then you can relax and just enjoy the day.

Be careful not to let water drip from an umbrella on your documents!

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